Virtual assistants such as Alexa are the font of all knowledge (to some), but when it comes to the all too real anxiety about the health of the global economy, and

What will happen to real estate market if Trump wins?

Trump is a fool when it comes to real estate.

He had the good luck of being born a rich white man with a cunning father who gave him tons of properties and for most real estate developers, the most important thing of all: connections.

Then, over the past forty years, the Donald proceeds to squander and torpedo all the connections and relationships that were literally handed to him on a silver platter. All the banks that funded the rise of his father’s real estate empire now avoid him like the plague. All the contractors who worked on his projects are either bankrupted by him or sufficiently wary as to pad all their bids generously to cover themselves when the Donald inevitably tries to stiff them.

In the end, Trump’s wealth grew only because of his dumb luck to ride up the spectacular boom in New York City real estate over the past forty years. His few holdings have done well, in spite of his many mis-steps. So yes, he’s a rich guy who was born rich and got lucky enough to stay rich, not much of an achievement in itself.

In that case, what’s his likely impact on real estate as (God forbid) President of the United States?

He’s definitely not going to help with housing as a rising housing market brings him no benefit. If anything, he’ll work on increasing the tax exemptions available to rental property owners so landlords like him can get a fatter cut of rental profits, and he’ll severely limit new development so rental rates get squeezed higher. As a developer, Trump knows the hurdles to real estate development (probably the only thing he truly knows besides how to grab pussies and his daughter’s shapely figure), so it’ll be easy for him to stall new projects, unless he gets his palms righteously greased.

To that end, I’m not complaining. Trump’s likely policies will benefit landlords like myself, probably tremendously. Rising rents and lowered taxes will be more than pleasant to my bottomline. Ironically, his most fervent supporters are also the very tenants most likely to get squeezed by his new real estate policies.

For the sake of the Republic and to protect Trump’s supporters from Trump, I’ve already sent in my vote for Hillary. I’d much rather have a country that tries to take care of everyone instead of just lining the pockets of a few. But if there’s enough stupidity in this country to get Trump elected, I look forward to bigger rent checks.